Archives for April 2010

TV Tidbits

These are just some random tidbits that I picked up while watching TV and working on the computer last night.

Don’t panic, I’m not starting an American Idol recap even though I did have a request for one.

We’ve always watched it. This season is a snoozer. Just my opinion along with this tidbit…

Who knew Shakira could play the harmonica?

Every singer does not need to come to the country side. Just because they know country music fans are the most loyal fans in the music industry.

Even with Rascal Flatts singing with her, I’m not buying it.

Scary Baby predicted the vote off and she’ll be excited to know she was right.

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Mary Hart on Editorial Entertainment Tonight made me laugh out loud.

And she’s really not all that funny.

But here’s a recap of the closing story…

Sandra Bullock has filed for divorce and the papers say their marriage…

“…has become insupportable because of discord or conflict of personalities.”

Jesse James is still holding out hope and said in a statement to People magazine…

“I know in my heart that I can be the best father possible to my four children, and the mate Sandy deserves…”

Mary Hart quipped:

“In another lifetime Jesse.”

Ouch.

Good one Mary.

Jesse James and Tiger Woods should be roommates since they’re both out of rehab.

ICKY.

And kudos to Sandra for a fresh start with her new baby!

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P.S. If you’re not watching Parenthood, you’re missing some of the best dysfunctional/normal family, real life TV that has been on in a long time. Find it online and start at the beginning. Caution: It’s a grown-up series not suitable for family hour. If you don’t have teens yet…you might not enjoy it as much as we do.

DWTS Recap

Sleep deprivation here.

Shortest recap ever.

Jake is Gone

Yipee!!!

Did he cry more than Kate?

Icky.

Weenie.

And Chelsie is his best friend and he loves her.

LOVES HER?

His Bachelor days put him on the fast track. It takes him just 7 short weeks to fall in love and cry. I hope Chelsie isn’t his backup plan.

Double icky.

It’s a light blogging week for me because I’m cranky when I don’t get enough sleep. PhilBillPaul is mostly responsible…any tips on how not kill your snoring husband with many sleep issues that he denies would be appreciated!

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A Decade + One Year

Was it really 11 years ago that I birthed that last baby?

She has brought us countless hours of entertainment…

She earned her name in so many ways.

And this year is no different.

Side note: She had some major stage fright in school performances even though she has always entertained us at home and in small groups of friends.

This is really for her darling twin sisters who couldn’t be at her breakout performance last month…and grandma and granny…and the 3 other readers brave enough to watch two minutes of PhilBillPaul’s very bad video of Scary Baby rapping with a friend from school…she’s the one on the left.

Happy Birthday darling last daughter.

We haven’t had a dull moment since you were born!

xoxo
Momma

DWTS One-Liners

The show was filled with some of my favorite one-liners thus far.

“On behalf of thick girls everywhere y’all need to vote for me, I’m tired and I’m hungry.”

“…more fun with a frock and coat hanger.”

“Eight little friends just stripped Bruno’s car.”

Other Random Observations

In my personal notes from Monday night I had typed I really never want to see Jake in his underwear again.

And oh goodness – we were subjected to it AGAIN.

The giant bandages on his knees were an added bonus.

Triple icky.

Chad and Cheryl got a totally weird song. So did not match their style or personality. Not fair.

I think Chad might want to tone down all the awkward innuendo. Don’t know or care if they are really an item. He seems to really be stressing her.

DG hung on. My sister will be glad to watch her for another week.

My three favs remain the same!

Photos from ABC

Nicole & Derek
I think she gets a bonus with his amazing choreography skills.

Evan & Anna
Looks like Edyta loaned Anna her costume. Icky

While I love his grace and elegance, is it just me or did it look like Evan was wearing a toupee? I did not dig the Little Lord Fauntleroy haircut.

Erin & Maks
I think I’ve made it clear about how I feel about watching them him.

A Fabulous Ending

I think this quote from Tony during their rehearsal summed up why she needed to leave.

“Kate has no motivation and I have to push her each week and it gets exhausting.

Tony was lovely and gracious while she gathered herself because she’s a self-proclaimed “cry baby”.

I’m trying to push out a tear. But I can’t. Because she brought her entire situation on herself. Good press. Bad press. And everything in between. I’m glad she’s finally off. Now let’s get on with the dancing!

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Standard Disclaimer: These are just my personal opinions and I’m sure I’d be friends in real life with each and every “star”, “was a star” and/or “never was a star”. Or not.

My Immaturity Knows No Bounds

I refuse to grow up.

Especially after the “Senior Moment” that I experienced in March of this year.

Kroger(s) Encounter, Part Two

A few days after I posted about my Kroger encounter, PhilBillPaul and I were in the store that I haven’t yet boycotted all together.

I stopped in my tracks when I saw my cashier “friend.”

I do refuse to go through her line.

You know, she’s the one who asked me…

“Are you a senior?”

And, NO, she was not on auto pilot using her awesome Kroger customer service training skills as blog reader Karen nicely suggested. She looked me right in the eye and asked me that after I declined the dollar donation.

Score: 1 for Maxine Cashier Insult
Score: 0 for meeting donation quota that day

Anyway…

I had mentioned in the post that I should go back and snap a picture of her so you could see her uncanny resemblance to Maxine.

I’m nothing, if not a woman of my word.

Thank you for this blog therapy session. I’m going to go watch Maks on Tivo.

I feel better already.

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P.S. It is now time for my darling, sweet blogger friend Leigh Anne to comment about her senior moment(s) so we can all feel better. Jump in Mrs. Wilkes. 😉

Happy Spring & Yellow Stuff

Last week, the darling twins informed me during one of our amusing Skype video chat sessions that they do not watch Dancing With The Stars and would like me to blog about something else.

As if they have some control over blog content?

Hardly.

But in their honor and in their absence, I thought I would share a little bit about what they are missing here in the lovely metropolitan Atlanta area.

Yellow Stuff

The pollen count in Atlanta is off the charts ridiculous. While we embrace the gorgeous spring time weather, we mostly enjoy it closed up in our house for at least this first month. Because we can’t breathe. And everything is covered in pollen.

No one believes us until they actually visit during pollen season. PhilBillPaul’s mom used to think she had plenty of pollen and dust to contend with in Texas. Until she stayed here one pollen season with our darling children and took them to the park. You know how sometimes you forget where you park and it takes you a moment to find your car?

Granny lost our van…because it was maroon when she drove to the park and had turned yellow while she was at the park.

Here’s Roger Leroy’s car that sits in the driveway while she’s in Arizona.

It used to be bright blue.

I hear a neighbor has photographed it for some contest about the most pollen-covered car.

This is a picture of The Pollen River after a rainy day during Scary Baby’s spring break.

This stuff makes us all sick and cranky. Add in a migraine or two and we are delightful to be around.

This was the headline from an article in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution on April 6th:

Tuesday’s pollen count nearly doubles to 2,967

In case you didn’t know and this is taken directly from the article…
“Anything over 120 is considered extremely high.”

More fun details from the article:

George Gottlieb, an allergist at DeKalb Medical Center said metro Atlanta allergy sufferers have a long season in front of them. He said the pine pollen season should end by mid-May but will be followed by hickory and pecan tree and grass pollen seasons through June.

Gottlieb offered several tips to help allergy sufferers through the pollen season:

  • Keep windows closed in your home and car.
  • Use the “recirculate” setting on your car air conditioning.
  • Do not use an attic fan for ventilation.
  • Schedule outdoor activities carefully; pollen counts are highest early in the morning.
  • Outdoor exercise in the evening is best.
  • Avoid going outdoors on windy days.
  • Avoid mowing lawns or blowing leaves.
  • Wash your clothes and your hair after being out in the pollen.
  • Wash your pet after being out in the pollen.

Hey – darling twins, did you read all that? I can’t mow the yard. I can’t exercise. I can’t walk the dogs. I can’t go out when it’s windy. I can’t schedule any early morning outside activities because that’s when the pollen count is highest…

Geez, it’s almost like I have to hibernate like a bear during pollen season. 😉

Oh wait, maybe nothing has really changed since you left.

So what’s your pollen count? I’m looking to relocate…

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P.S. We do miss you darling twins and I’m still going to write about DWTS.

DWTS Questions

First, my top three favs for this week in no particular order…

Photos from ABC

Last night’s show left me with bunches of questions:

What’s with all the sequined panties?

I much prefer a full costume to the underwear and bikinis we keep seeing.

I’m gathering signatures for a memo to ABC. Who is with me on this?

Here’s the rough draft:

It’s family hour and we could all do with less crotch shots and boobage (why yes, I’m sure that’s a word). Thank you very much.

Before last night, did you know there was a platinum violin duo?

I didn’t. Was hoping they would bust out “Devil Went Down to Georgia.”

Was it just me or did that ballerina have some serious man legs?

No disrespect and know she earned those muscles.Did we need to see Nicole crying because she was disappointed in herself after getting 2nd highest scores?

I say no. Save your despair for when the camera is off.

What was that “Glambo” thing with Tony?

Don’t do that anymore. Please.

How does Jake trip multiple times and get to stay?

Vienna Sausage obviously has a huge fan base calling in for him. Poor Chelsie.

Does anyone else think since Dirty Girl is staying, she should add a pole to her dances?

Yes, she did look more graceful and I was glad she was more covered up but still.

Was anyone else irritated that Len wanted to see less of Edyta and more of DG (Dirty Girl)?

I would have liked to seen more of Aiden and never see Kate again.

Speaking of Aiden, wasn’t he a class act from start to finish?

He got choked up at the end and I wish he could have stayed longer.

And the final question…

WHO IS VOTING FOR KATE?

Please tell them to stop. I think TLC is paying people to call in for her.

Please weigh in. Answer any of the questions above. Comment with your observations. This is important conversation. 😉

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Standard Disclaimer: These are just my personal opinions and I’m sure I’d be friends in real life with each and every “star”, “was a star” and/or “never was a star”. Or not.

Exercise Your DWTS Voting Privilege

Just a friendly reminder about who NOT to vote for tonight.

Spread the word!

I would, however, vote for Jimmy Fallon. 😉

Thanks to blog reader Susan who brought this little funny to my attention.

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The Masters Story They Forgot to Highlight

I spent the better part of this weekend doing three things:

  • 1) Watching The Masters–that’s a golf tournament held in Augusta, Georgia for all you non-golfers–that I have watched for many, many years long before golf became somewhat socially cool or there was anyone named Tiger on the tour.
  • 2) Trying to control myself and not actually publish a blog post over the weekend
  • 3) Yelling at the TV every time the announcers fell all over themselves about Tiger and his “time off.”

Side note: I actually had to text my golf friend Toni and call my mom to say that I’ve never cheered so loudly for someone to lose. Yes, I’m admitting it here and yes, the sermon at church was about forgiveness.

So please forgive me.

I swear I was really trying to exhibit better self-control and not blog about this again. Mostly because he doesn’t deserve ANY. MORE. PRESS.

And we all know the giant readership here on my blog could affect his career.

Then I remembered it’s my personal blog and I can blog about whatever I want. As I like to say to blog clients when I’m getting them started–remember to chant this to yourself whenever you need to…

My Blog. My Rules.

Before I go off on my Tiger rant, I want to acknowledge the REAL story at The Masters this year.

The real story of a golfer who took time off is the story of Phil Mickelson. He’s a golfer who spent some time away from the game to be by his wife’s side when she was diagnosed with breast cancer last year. Seems to have his priorities in place. I can’t imagine their struggles thus far and his mother was diagnosed a short time after his wife was.

Go Phil Go! Such a fabulous victory on every level. It was our honor to watch you win!

I wish I could say that they highlighted his amazing game and his personal story at every opportunity during the tournament.

Instead, we had to hear about Tiger’s amazing game after his 5 month hiatus. Or whatever we’re calling it these days. We had to witness every moment of his fake smile as he engaged with the fans for the first time in years. I’m pretty sure he had an invisible earpiece in with his P.R. team telling him things like…

“Show some teeth as you walk to the green. Smile for the gallery.”

“Say hi to some people that you normally would never talk to.”

“Offer to sign their hat or pat a little kid on the head.”

Frankly, I didn’t buy any of it. He was gritting his teeth. It was all a big act. The calm *new* Tiger who has embraced Buddhism and is working on controlling his temper was nowhere to be found when he hit a bad shot on Saturday and yelled “SUCK” and uttered a profanity loudly.

He entered The Masters with his well-oiled P.R. team making sure he was in a gilded cage and protected environment where he calls the shots – golf and otherwise. The only thing authentic about him is still his colossal arrogance.

Now here’s my favorite part of the weekend coverage!

Billy Payne called him out on it.

And then I read a bunch of criticism of Billy Payne and why he shouldn’t have said anything. Especially at the beginning of The Masters.

WHAT?

How do we get to the place where we’re all okay with acting like we don’t have all the sordid details about his total lack of discretion over and over again.

Who said we had to handle him with kid gloves? Why are we avoiding the elephant in the room and walking around on eggshells after his disgusting behavior?

Virtual High Five to Billy Payne

Instead of criticizing Billy Payne, why don’t we celebrate that he was brave enough to call him out in a very professional manner and he was dead on with his comments.

Furthermore, I read at least five articles that made it sound like this was the only thing Payne said.

A few minutes research shows how wrong that is. His opening remarks contained 1874 words and only 284 of those words were directed at Tiger.

Oh, but they were 284 lovely, respectful, truthful words.

Sentences in bold are my personal favorites.

“Finally, we are not unaware of the significance of this week to a very special player, Tiger Woods. A man who in a brief 13 years clearly and emphatically proclaimed and proved his game to be worthy of the likes of Bobby Jones, Jack Nicklaus and Arnold Palmer. As he ascended in our rankings of the world’s great golfers, he became an example to our kids that success is directly attributable to hard work and effort.

But as he now says himself, he forgot in the process to remember that with fame and fortune comes responsibility, not invisibility. It is not simply the degree of his conduct that is so egregious here; it is the fact that he disappointed all of us, and more importantly, our kids and our grand kids. Our hero did not live up to the expectations of the role model we saw for our children.

Is there a way forward? I hope yes. I think yes. But certainly his future will never again be measured only by his performance against par; but measured by the sincerity of his efforts to change. I hope he now realizes that every kid he passes on the course wants his swing, but would settle for his smile. I hope he can come to understand that life’s greatest rewards are reserved for those who bring joy to the lives of other people. We at Augusta hope and pray that our great champion will begin his new life here tomorrow in a positive, hopeful and constructive manner, but this time, with a significant difference from the past. This year, it will not be just for him, but for all of us, who believe in second chances. ”

You can read the full transcript here.

Good Guys Can Finish First

And once again, let me say CONGRATULATIONS to Phil Mickelson.

It’s always nice to see the better man win!

Now, I’m going to practice restraint and not write a ranting blog post about Jesse James.

If you are an email subscriber, come visit the blog after 1:00 p.m. EST for a quick laugh.

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Scary Baby Lemon Cake Bakery

The bakery can bear her name even if she only showed up for the fun part.

She used the Pampered Chef squirty icing thingy with expertise.

Yes, we are professional bakers with professional tools.

Perhaps I made the rest of the cake.

Labor intensive is an understatement. A cake with 4 different steps is not typically anything I tackle. I leave that to my friend Leigh Anne.

But the lemon cake recipes with gorgeous pictures that appeared on blogs here and here one day apart spoke to me.

So now my biggest Easter cooking decision was which lemon cake to make.

I went with the Lemon Truffle Cake.

The cake recipes are very, very similar with exception of quantity of baking powder, lemon zest and milk vs. buttermilk.

I did get wild and I used the Lemon Curd recipe from the Lemon Crumb Cake because Leigh Anne said it was amazing and she knows her lemon curd! (And I didn’t want to throw away 3 egg yolks.)

For non-bakers I want to break it down for you:

Step 1 >>> Homemade white cake – best cake I’ve ever made.

Step 2 >>> Homemade lemon curd – like I’ve ever made this in MY LIFE?!

Step 3 >>> Homemade filling – yum.

Step 4 >>> Homemade whipped cream – double yum.

Now I know that you could streamline all of this with a boxed white cake mix, a jar of lemon curd and a can of whipped cream (you’ll still have to mix up the filling of white chocolate, cream cheese and lemon curd) but since this was seriously the only thing I was cooking for Easter, I went for broke.

Oh, wait I did make cheeseburgers and baked beans.

Side note: We did go out to eat after church. It was a little weird for us to be a family of three with the darling twins in Arizona and The Grunter working.

Scary Baby did make the cake lovely with her finishing touches. She actually wanted to add lemon slices to the top but I had to nix that idea. (Remember this is the fondant child.) The lemon slices would have put us at 5 steps and I had already exceeded my time investment/dessert ratio.

She is also a 4th child who prefers the store bought, super tacky, premade Easter baskets to the homemade theme baskets created by her loving mother many years before she was born.

I have adapted to that change and sent PhilBillPaul to Walgreen’s on Friday to pick out her basket. Sad but true.

She is very discreetly covering the giant price tag sticker that he left on when he retrieved the said basket from his truck. The sticker was not easily removable from the cellophane.

Hello Walgreen’s? We can’t really pass it off as our own now, can we?

Have a great weekend and if you get bored or have company, bake a lemon cake–it’s a whole lot of cake for 3 people to eat. The Grunter doesn’t like lemon. Whatever.

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P.S. I did give two slices to a friend and The Grunter’s girlfriend had a piece too. Rave reviews from both! Just didn’t want you to think that the 3 of us ate the whole cake. 😉

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